Saturday, July 4, 2009

Even More People Who Steal My Good Ideas

I've previously detailed how my brilliant idea for an ice cream flavor was stolen by Ben & Jerry's. Several years ago, a South Park script I wrote was replicated in stunning detail on an actual episode of the show. I'm dismayed to report that my fertile mind has yet again been raped and pillaged.

In April, I wrote a post about how various historical figures might have used Twitter. Today I was innocently surfing the web and came across a blog called Historical Tweets. Cocoa Puffs fell from my mouth as I stared agape at my pilfered creation. I certainly recognize that a great idea might occur to more than one person. But three times? The script, the ice cream, and now historical tweets?? And this isn't even counting the way Hulu infiltrated my brain to appropriate an inside joke!

I've had it, Internet. I've had it with you and your underhanded thievery. You'll get no more good ideas from me. Henceforth, I will traffic exclusively in terrible ideas. This way, if you continue your dastardly behavior, you will at least be punished with bad content.

Here then, Internet, let me give you a sneak preview of some things I've been working on:

* A richly illustrated coffee table book exploring life at a 55-and-over nudist colony.

* A weekly newsletter written by and devoted exclusively to the adorable activities of Princess Foo-Foo, an unnervingly anthropomorphized Persian cat.

* A PBS miniseries that investigates scientific accuracy in the television show Battlestar Galactica, hosted by a rotating series of bachelor computer programmers.

* A blog in which Don Koharski of Skokie, Illinois uses each night's frozen Hungry Man dinner as a jumping off point to detail the unending agony and haunting loneliness that have reduced his life to an interminable wait for the sweet relief of death.

Have at it, boys!

16 metawords:

Soda and Candy said...

That blog idea is genius, and I am totally stealing it!

; )

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Do you honestly expect Princess Foo-Foo NOT to happen, and NOT to be a major success?

If you do, then you're vastly underestimating people's love of things they thing are "cute" and "cuddly".

180|360 said...

It was hard to get past your use of the word "anthropomorphized." Impressive, Words.

words...words...words... said...

So if I understand you guys correctly, even when I try to be terrible on purpose I'm still a genius.

You can't turn this off.

Girl Interrupted said...

Duh! You should patent your ideas! That's what I do.

Btw ... keep an eye out for the "BlackBunny", the must-have item for the single girl of the naughty noughties, a BlackBerry stylishly fused with a Rabbit ;)

The poxy iPhone doesn't have an app for THAT!

Muahahaha ... I'm going to be a gazillionaire baby!!! Oh yeah!

words...words...words... said... could even synchronize the Rabbit with the vibrate function to enable remote nookie! "Call me every minute for five minutes. Then call me every thirty seconds for two minutes. Then keep hitting redial until I tell you to stop. And don't ask any questions."

the girl with the pink teacup said...

Words, I hate to tell you this, but your 'Princess the Cat' idea has been stolen... Sort of. I was recently introduced to the horrors of Matt Stone and Trey Parker's Princess the Dog cartoon. OK, so it's not a weekly newsletter, and yeah, it features a dog, but I think you'll agree that 'unnerving' is definitely the adjective of choice here. Please, no more good ideas from you, words. I don't think the world is ready for them.

Girl Interrupted: Put me down for 10 BlackBunnies. Immediately.

(PS - That link is absolutely NOT work safe. Or safe at all, really. Just be warned that it's mentally scarring, in a similar way that The Veg Assassin's recent non-work-safe link was. Had to share the horror around to lessen my burden.)

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

You're right, sir, you can't squelch genius of your level.

Now...if you could figure out a way to get me published...that would make you a True and Undoubted Genius for Eternity.


The Diva on a Diet said...

Waah, the previous comments beat me to it ... Princess Foo-Foo sounds like Disney gold to me. Clearly, its time you started wearing the tin foil hat.

Cora said...

Just tell me your South Park script wasn't "The Gingers" one.

Cora said...

Hee hee hee....

Your blog is telling me "worswoe." See, Words, it could be worse. ;-)

JennyMac said...

Great post....thanks for the laugh this am.

Prunella Jones said...

Hey! The Princess Foo Foo idea is mine. You obviously read my thoughts psychically through the internet waves during the exact moment I took off my tin foil hat, you bastard! I'm going to alert my husband, Jesus, to this situation, count on it!

Oh, and I enjoyed this post.

words...words...words... said...

Nice try, Pru, but no dice.

And I'm so not afraid of your husband. He's a sandal-wearing hippie pacifist.

BeckEye said...

Hey, I invented the pissed-off, ripped-off act!

Anonymous said...

Hahaha... great plan.

We're surrounded by thieves. Grrr.