Monday, January 26, 2009

The Emperor Has No Parachute Pants

Inspired by one of the seventeen posts Dr. Zibbs made during his lunch break today. The one about The Breakfast Club.

Some Pop Culture Sacred Cows From My Youth That Sucked Then, Suck Now And Will Suck For All Time

The Breakfast Club


Fruit Roll-Ups

The Goonies

Farrah Fawcett

Star Blazers

The Electric Slide

H.R. Pufnstuf

Kix (the cereal AND the band)

Real Genius

Not taking our clothes off to have a good time

Midnight Oil

Lynn Swann

Jolt Cola


Cheech & Chong

The Lost Boys

Marcia Brady haircuts

Z. Cavaricci

Cool Ranch Doritos

Bucky Dent

Bob Geldof the musician (not Bob Geldof the humanitarian)

Janet Jackson

Lloyd Dobler

The A-Team

Nerds (the candy, not the social outcasts)

Discuss. A point to anyone (besides Beckeye) who can pick out which one Beckeye will disembowel me for.

15 metawords:

Dr Zibbs said...

I agree with every single one!!!!!

And my guess for Beckeye is Madonna? If I hear one more person praising how that white trash is a genius at reinveting herself I'm going to jump off a cliff.

red said...

Wow. I don't have time to point out all the things wrong with this list.

The Imaginary Reviewer said...

I disagree with a lot of the films, but all is forgiven for the inclusion of ET. That film was the biggest bag of shite ever.

SouthernBelle said...

I cannot hate on the Breakfast Club. I love 80's era Judd Nelson and his Grand Canyon nostrils.

Cora said...

Okay, so clearly we must be about the same age if you too remember that "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off" travesty. That song was a hit for about two hours. And it was two hours too much.

I agree with your list... except for Star Blazers, ET and (hanging head in embarrassed shame here) The A-Team. I loved them. Of course, I haven't seen any of those in years, so I might feel differently now if I were to catch them again. which I don't really plan on doing. Although it might be nice to find out how Star Blazers ended, because I never found out. (sniffle).

And thanks for not hating nerds. I appreciate it.


Kimizzy said...

You know I agreed with almost everything except some of the films. Other than that, I had no clue that "Not taking our clothes off to have a good time" was a song.

Needless to say, thinking you were referring to the innocence of yesteryear, I was laughing my ass off saying "True that!" to no one except my idiotic self.

You know, I don't know Beckeye well enough yet to make an educated guess, so I'll guess fruit roll ups.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

We are of the same generation. Some great memories there and not all of them suck for me.
Beckeye will pick apart H&R puffin stuff. She of the ever ranging Popeye will pick it apart for the piece of crap that it was. (dare I say it?? I loved it anyway)

Gwen said...

Sorry, I loved them all and still do. Well, except for the Electric Slide.

Sure wish I had a fruit roll-up.

Rebecca said...

Beckeye will cut you for disrespecting the Lost Boys. I don't know her. I might be projecting.

ÄsK AliCë said...

Okay now just you wait a minute here - fruit roll-ups? How can you hate on those sticky, messy, melt-in-your-mouth-with-a-touch-of-grainy-ness-thrown-in, plastic wrapped, gummy, oozy masses of pure joy? They have real fruit in them you know.

And what is wrong with Farrah Fawcett? Her hair is an immortal beacon of peace, love and the lack of frizz-control cream in the 70s!

Shadow said...
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BeckEye said...

Zibbs, it's like you don't even know me at all. Praising Madonna is not an activity I take part in. Much like jogging.

Rebecca is pretty on target. I would have normally flipped out about The Lost Boys or The Breakfast Club's inclusion on this list, until I realized that you dared to put Lynn Fucking Swann on here. I would disembowel you, but this clearly shows that you might have serious psychological issues, and I don't pick on the mentally ill. If you're into that, try out for American Idol.

By the way, I will agree that The Goonies and all forms of Kix suck. And although I would like to agree with you on the suckage of Real Genius, Val Kilmer's awesome lips and hair preclude me from doing so. Plus, that other kid from the movie's resemblance to Sarah Jessica Parker is hilarious.

words words words said...

Lynn Fucking Swann is the correct answer! Sadly, Beckeye is ineligible to win a prize in this competition.

Falwless said...

I would have guessed correctly had I known who the fuck Lynn Swann was (I just googled him and found out).

I can't believe you put The Goonies on this list. The Goonies is AWESOME! I've seen that movie upwards of 18 times. It gets better every time.

"Because it's their time. Their time! Up there! Down here, it's our time. It's our time down here. That's all over the second we ride up Troy's bucket."

Also, The Breakfast Club is pure cinematic magic. LOVE it. All the rest of the stuff I agree with. Wait, wait, except Cool Ranch Doritos and Kix (the cereal). I am not even kidding when I say I just bought a box of Kix two days ago at the grocery store. Mmmmmmm!

Anonymous said...

H.R. Pufnstuf is awesome still!