Immodest Proposal

I've decided to change my last name to "Grbk".

Have you ever noticed how sometimes semi-notable people continue to enjoy disproportionate fame because their unusual names bail out lazy crossword puzzle writers? Mel Ott, Don Ho and Bobby Orr, I'm talking about you. Mel Ott was a baseball player in the 1930s and 40s, and would have completely vanished into the mists of history if his name didn't contain an unusual letter combination. Today, crossword enthusiasts who don't even follow baseball know of his impressive but long-forgotten exploits. Messrs. Ho and Orr, while more generally known, still make it onto the list of Crossword All-Stars. I imagine it will be quite a blow to Don Ho's ongoing level of fame if "ho" is ever accepted as a legitimate form of "whore" and the Blue Fairy turns it into a real word.

You can see the advantages of changing my name to Grbk. With a vowel-free surname and even the slightest hint of success, I would vault to the top of the Crossword All-Stars and appear in the New York Times on a regular basis. I will forever be the answer to the clue, "Minor early 21st-century humorist (4)".