Fatiquette

A conversation I had over the weekend reminded me of this story, which I can't believe I've never written here about.

I was at a party thrown by the movie I'm working on. Usually there is a wrap party at the end of a movie, where they rent out a bar or a club and everything is free. But this movie also threw a "Halfway Party" since the movie is halfway finished. They can call it whatever they want if the food and liquor are free. Maybe "Bob".

Anyway, that's not what I came here to tell you. THIS is the actual story:

I'm in the bar area, and there are waiters passing around trays of appetizers. Suddenly, there appears in front of me this large, bulbous man who is grinning broadly and holding a chicken satay stick in each of his meaty paws. He nudges me and says, "Boy, this is heaven for fat guys, isn't it?"

I honestly had no idea what to say. I mean, I know I'm kinda fat. But it's an entirely different thing for another fat guy (who, I say in the interest of nothing but vanity, was clearly way fatter than me) to nudge you and talk to you like you're an old fraternity brother in Alpha Blobba Kappa.

Of course, I could always drop fifty pounds and avoid this sort of thing entirely.