In a departure from previous installments of The G-Chat Diaries, I have redacted several statements from Chatter X to preserve the tattered remains of his/her reputation. If you would like to be featured in a future installment, just hit up WWW via the Plugoo chat application over there on the right!
Chatter X: I'm talking to you from an unsecured wireless network...is that bad? Can people see this?
WWW: No it just means there's no password for the network.
Chatter X: I'm totally stealing someone's internet.
Chatter X: So they can't see what I'm doing?
WWW: Nope.
Chatter X: Unless they're some kind of brilliant hacker?
WWW: And also, if they cared.
Chatter X: Off to the porn sites! If my identity is stolen and my [Naughty!] are published somewhere, I'm killing you.
WWW: I'm okay with that.
Chatter X: Not afraid of death, eh?
WWW: We both know you're too lazy to travel 3,000 miles to kill anyone.
Chatter X: That's true.
Chatter X: Although, while I was there I could try to swing by that whatever festival to see [Shitty band Chatter X loves]. I get all the festivals confused.
Chatter X: It's not Bonnaroo.
Chatter X: Uhhh. [Expletive].
Chatter X: I hate when information falls out of my head.
WWW: Coachella?
Chatter X: YES
Chatter X: They're headlining Coachella this year.
WWW: Really?
Chatter X: Yes.
WWW: Was Jesus Jones unavailable?
Chatter X: [Shitty band Chatter X loves] is huge, what are you talking about?
WWW: Huge? Hmm. Moderately. Besides, I just don't like them at all. Despite the presence of [Chatter X’s stalkee].
Chatter X: Well, you're stupid.
Chatter X: That's my only retort.
WWW: It's an old reliable one.
Chatter X: POOL IS STUPID!
WWW: I like pool!
Chatter X: I know, I was quoting Jeff Winger. Oh, how I wish full frontal was allowed on NBC.
Chatter X: I'm very curious to [Trust me, you're better not knowing] what Joel McHale is packing.
WWW: I should interject here, in case this ever becomes a Chatter X post, that we are speaking about an episode of the delightful NBC comedy Community, starring Joel McHale as wisecracking ex-lawyer turned community college student Jeff Winger.
Chatter X: That's true. You know, I have this theory that they sort of named Joel's character after Bill Murray's in Stripes.
Chatter X: John Winger / Jeff Winger. They're both charming, wisecracking smartasses.
WWW: Hmm. Not Kip Winger?
Chatter X: Nah, not enough hair (chest and head) for that. And he never pirouettes.
Chatter X: It can't be Debra Winger, because Joel's voice isn't deep enough.
WWW: I think we've exhausted pop culture Wingers.
Monday, May 3, 2010
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7 metawords:
Curses, I was all about to interject some Kip Winger into this conversation, but you already hit it...like it was only seventeen--SEVENTEEN!!!!
I love Community so much. Joel McHale is not attractive, objectively, but man I would so hit that if I could. Sarcastic wit does it for me big time.
I'm torn between thinking I'll never chat you up for fear of appearing in one of these ... or wanting to say something really outrageous so I will! Only time will tell.
Damn it. I've never seen Community. I'm such a TV trivia boob. *hanging head in shame*
My wv: "wammo" *snicker*
I almost thought Chatter X was me because of the "[Shitty band Chatter X loves]" but then I realized we'd never had this conversation.
Not that I know anything about this, but I can almost guarantee that the band in question is not shitty in any way. Everyone knows that WWW's taste in music is questionable.
I have to agree, BeckEye. ;)
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